& Recently . . .

Dear the Gap

by Josh Abraham

Gap Customer Relations 100 Gap Online Drive Grove City, Ohio 43123-8605 Dear the Gap, I’m working on a screenplay for a major motion picture that will be coming soon to a theater near you. I write this letter to invite…

The Semi-Private Thoughts of Connie Chung

by Josh Abraham

12:08 p.m. I can’t believe I slept till two o’clock. I’m so hung over. Where’s Maury? My head hurts. 12:15 p.m. Oh, it’s twelve, not two. Whew. Thank God. What do I have to do today? Hmmm. Nothing. Good. Where’s…

Why I Will Never Win the Nobel Peace Prize

by Geoff Wolinetz

Nobel Prize Nomination Committee 1220 Alfred Nobel Way Oslo, Norway January 31, 2003 Dear Mr. Wolinetz, On behalf of the Nobel Committee, I would like to thank your for the submission of your application for consideration for the 2002 Nobel…

Polish Fact

Signifcant Polish Populations
Australia: 200,000 (est.)
Argentina: 350,000 (est.)
Belarus: 400,000 (est.)
Brazil: 800,000 (est.)
Canada: 850,000 (est.)
Germany: 200,000 (est.)
Lithuania: 250,000 (est.)
Russia: 100,000 (est.)
U.K.: 220,000 (est.)
Ukraine: 150,000 (est.)
U.S.A.: 8,900,000 (includes non-primary ancestry) (est.)
Poland: 36,983,720 (2002)

Learn a Foreign Tongue!

¿Habla Español?
¡Choque y temor! ¡Misión lograda! ¿Qué guerra?
Shock and awe! Mission accomplished! What war?

Y.P.aRt Gallery

Syndicate! RSD | RSS I | RSS II | Atøm
Large Print | Spanish Bea! Add http://yankeepotroast.org to your Kinja digest Creative Commons License
This journal is licensed under a Creative Commons License and powered by Movable Typo 3.15.
© MMV, Y.P.R. & Co.
Friday, February 28, 2003   |    Fiction

A Good Piece of ‘S’

by Sally Reardon

“Sally, you’re silly,” Sully said softly.

“Sully, I’m not trying to be silly,” said Sally sullenly. “So don’t sully my name.”

“Sorry, Sally. I don’t want to say something sordid that would stop you from saying something sweet to me,” Sully said sadly.

“Sorry’s all you had to say,” said Sally, smiling seductively at Sully.

“Sally, are you trying to seduce me?” said Sully, slighly sweaty.

“See here, Sully, I’m not saying I’m seducing you. Let me segue into something else. Have you seen Sammy since Susie’s soirée?”

“Sally, don’t skirt the issue. Are you putting the squeeze on me?” Sully said, squinting.

Sally smacked Sully.

“Sully, surely you can stand to be slightly smooth? Swipe that smirk off your face. God, I simply must have a smoke.”

“I need a Scotch,” scratched Sully, “Someone send me a Scotch!” He shouted sharply.

“Sully, I’m sleepy. I’m going to slip into something a little more slinky.”

“Slick, Sally. Slide over.”

“Oh, Sully, I can’t stress so much. Shall we stop these shenanigans?” said Sally, shuffling out of her shoes, stripping off her stockings.

“Sally, stop!” said Sully. “What would Señor Sancho say?”

“Sully, Sancho’s stopping at the store. He’s storming the stacks at the store for sticky stuff,” said Sally, sticking to it, slinking off her skirt, sliding out of her shirt.

“Sancho will be steamed if he stops here first.” Sully shied away but she straddled him.

“Shit, Sally,” shouted Sully, “Surely, you can show some self-control.”

“Sully, sex me!”



“On second thought, sex sounds sweet. Let’s screw,” said Sully.

“Sex it is!” Sally screamed.

Sally swiftly snatched Sully and sprinted off.


Sally Reardon enjoys her Tae-Bo class and loves Billy Blanks. Not in the way you think she means. She wants to have sex with him. Her life is fairly simple. Everyday, she takes a morning bath. She wets her hair. Wraps a towel round her as she's heading toward the bedroom chair. It's just another day. Slipping into stockings, stepping into shoes. Dipping in the pocket of her raincoat. It's just another day. At the office where the papers grow, she takes a break. Drinks another coffee, she finds it hard to stay awake. It's just another day. Doo doo doo doo doo doo. It's just another day. Sally comes from Nashua, New Hampshire, and currently resides in Williamsburg, Brooklyn.