& Recently . . .

A Good Piece of ‘S’

by Sally Reardon

“Sally, you’re silly,” Sully said softly. “Sully, I’m not trying to be silly,” said Sally sullenly. “So don’t sully my name.” “Sorry, Sally. I don’t want to say something sordid that would stop you from saying something sweet to me,”…

Dear the Gap

by Josh Abraham

Gap Customer Relations 100 Gap Online Drive Grove City, Ohio 43123-8605 Dear the Gap, I’m working on a screenplay for a major motion picture that will be coming soon to a theater near you. I write this letter to invite…

The Semi-Private Thoughts of Connie Chung

by Josh Abraham

12:08 p.m. I can’t believe I slept till two o’clock. I’m so hung over. Where’s Maury? My head hurts. 12:15 p.m. Oh, it’s twelve, not two. Whew. Thank God. What do I have to do today? Hmmm. Nothing. Good. Where’s…

Why I Will Never Win the Nobel Peace Prize

by Geoff Wolinetz

Nobel Prize Nomination Committee 1220 Alfred Nobel Way Oslo, Norway January 31, 2003 Dear Mr. Wolinetz, On behalf of the Nobel Committee, I would like to thank your for the submission of your application for consideration for the 2002 Nobel…

Polish Fact

Major illicit producer of amphetamine for the international market; minor transshipment point for Asian and Latin American illicit drugs to Western Europe.

Learn a Foreign Tongue!

Habla Español!
Los talentos de Andy Richter se pierden totalmente en "Quintuplets."
Andy Richter's talents are completely wasted on "Quintuplets."

Y.P.aRt Gallery

Syndicate! RSD | RSS I | RSS II | Atøm
Large Print | Spanish Bea! Add http://yankeepotroast.org to your Kinja digest Creative Commons License
This journal is licensed under a Creative Commons License and powered by Movable Typo 3.15.
© MMV, Y.P.R. & Co.
Monday, March 3, 2003   |    Birthday Cards to Celebrities

Happy Birthday, Julie Bowen!

March 3, 1970 | Julie Bowen | hot chick/actress

Dear Ms. Julie Bowen,

Happy 33rd birthday! I watch your show, “Ed,” every week. It gives me great pleasure to see that doofus Ed chase your skirt around all episode. Since mere prose could not accurately convey my feelings, I’ve written a birthday haiku for you:

Ed chases Carol
Adventures in bowling lanes
Life in Stuckeyville

That took me 4 hours.

Geoff Wolinetz