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Thursday, December 4, 2003

“Social Studies,” if You Know What I Mean

Names of Some National Parks that Sound Like Titles of Pornographic Films

The Badlands
Big Bend National Park
Chattahoochee River National Recreation Area
Cumberland Gap National Historic Park
Dry Tortugas National Park
Grand Teton National Park
Hot Springs
Little Bighorn Battlefield
Longfellow National Historic Site
Lava Beds
Mammoth Cave
Minute Man National Historic Park
Organ Pipe Cactus National Monument
Scotts Bluff
Virgin Islands National Park

Conflicts That Sound Naughty

Trojan War
Punic Wars
Battle of Bunker Hill
Battle of the Bulge
The Children’s Crusade
Battle of Hastings
Battle of Midway
Battle of Little Bighorn
Gulf War

Names of Some U.S. Senators That Could Be Good Porn-Star Names

Sam Brownback (R - KS)
Barbara Boxer (D – CA)
Thad Cochran (R – MS)
Michael Crapo (R – ID)
John Ensign (R – NV)
Bill Frist (R – TN)
Orrin Hatch (R - UT)
Tim Johnson (D – SD)
Don Nickles (R – OK)
James Talent (R – MO)
Saxby Chambliss (R – GA)
Lincoln Chafee (R – RI)
Bob Packwood (R – OR, Ret.)

Names of Some U.S. Congresspersons That, if Not Porn-Star Names, Are Probably Totally Made Up Anyway

Spencer Bachus, Alabama
Norman Dicks, Washington
Fortney Stark, California
Roy Blunt, Missouri
Judy Biggert, Illinois
Marion Berry, Arkansas
Marsha Blackburn, Tennessee
Bob Goodlatte, Virginia
Sanford Bishop, Georgia
Elijah Cummings, Maryland
Christopher Cox, California
Mac Collins, Georgia
Calvin Dooley, California
John Dingell, Michigan
John Doolittle, California
Chris Chocola, Indiana
Lloyd Doggett, Texas
Eni Faleomavaega, American Samoa
Anna Eshoo, California
Rodney Frelinghuysen, New Jersey
Rush Holt, New Jersey
Baron Hill, Indiana
Doc Hastings, Washington
Gil Gutknecht, Minnesota
Bobby Rush, Illinois
Ike Skelton, Missouri
John Spratt, South Carolina
Melvin Watt, North Carolina