Happy Birthday, Cuba Gooding Jr.!
Dear Oscar-winner Cuba Gooding Jr.
Happy 36th Birthday!
Cubby, I’m a big-time movie producer, and I’ve just acquired the rights to a picture that I think you’d be perfect for the lead. It’s “mostly inspired by” the true story of Cuda Goobing, a retarded black football player that joins the Marine Corps and wins the Iditarod. It’s called Radio Dogs. It’s feel-good family fun! Show me the mush! I swear, if there’s anybody born to play the role, it’s you. Get back to me soon. I got the guy who played “Bubba” in Gump on the phone.
Big-time movie producer