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Crockpot!
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Y.P.R. & Co.

The Journal of Literary Satire | Hastily Written & Slopilly Edited
Monday, August 23, 2004
The Choire Sicha Roast

Choire Sicha, Literary Critic

& Y.P.R.

“That’s our Pam!”
—from “It’s Pam’s Tale”, a review of Pamela Anderson’s novel, Star,
in The New York Post, August 22nd, 2004.

“Ka-ching!”
—from “Plum’s Tarts”, a review of Plum Sykes’s novel, Bergdorf Blondes,
in The New York Times, April 18th, 2004.

“Too many words, for starters.”
—from “Who-Dune-It”, a review of Mark Mills’s novel, Amagansett,
in The New York Post, August 8th, 2004.

“I was written off, quite accurately, as a crackpot.”
—from “‘Tough Girl’ Fiction: Deadlier Than the Male,” an essay in
The New York Times, August 22nd, 2004.

Data Dump: The Choire Sicha Memoiral Library

by Andrew Krucoff

Titles of Books,
and the Likelihood of Their Appearance
on Choire’s Bookshelf

Star by Pamela Anderson (99%)
Bridget Jones’s Diary by Helen Fielding (with inscription “To Corey”) (97%)
The Nanny Diaries by Emma McLaughlin & Nicola Kraus (97%)
The Princess Diaries by Meg Cabot (96%)
Gossip Girl by Cecily von Ziegesar (95.5%)
The Girls’ Guide to Hunting and Fishing by Melissa Bank (93%)
Good in Bed by Jennifer Weiner (92%)
The Devil Wears Prada by Lauren Weisberger (with author’s photo scribbled out by black Sharpie) (91%)
The English Roses by Madonna (90%)
Sex by Madonna (89%)
The Way: Using the Wisdom of Kabbalah for Spiritual Transformation and Fulfillment by Michael Berg (89%)
The Hipster Handbook by Robert Lanham (with handwritten marginalia) (89%)
Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret by Judy Blume (87%)
Claudia and the Phantom Phone Calls: (The Baby-Sitters Club #2) by Ann M. Martin (86%)
MTV’s The Real World: New Orleans - Unmasked! by Alison Pollet (74%)
Queen Bees & Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends & Other Realities of Adolescence by Rosalind Wiseman (66%)
The Bad Girl’s Guide to Getting What You Want by Cameron Tuttle (61%)
Bitch by Elizabeth Wurtzel (54%)
Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides (50%)
Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King by J.R.R. Tolkein (49%)
The Art of War by Sun Tzu (highlighted) (38%)
Big Russ and Me by Tim Russertt (30%)
Hatchet Jobs by Dale Peck (unopened) (30%)
Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk (14%)
Have a Nice Day by Mick Foley (13%)
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey (8.5%)
Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance by Robert M. Pirsig (7%)
Jack: Straight from the Gut by Jack Welch (6%)
Op-Center by Tom Clancy (2%)
The Bible (2%)
Let Freedom Ring: Winning the War of Liberty over Liberalism by Sean Hannity (0.6%)
Women: Maxim’s Unauthorized Guide (0.01%)
The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Creating a Web Page and Blog by Paul McFedries (81%)

Andrew Krucoff spreads thin and wide at The Other Page and at Lifehacker
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