Who Wants to Watch "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?"

Hey, kids! Do you like the TV?

As many of you know by now, Geoff Wolinetz, your humble coëditor, taped an episode of "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?" in December of last year. The show is no longer hosted by Regis. Those of you wondering what it's like to meet him will either have to talk to Kelly Ripa or stake out his apartment because Mr. Wolinetz has no answer for you. The show is now hosted by Meredith Vieira who is as lovely and pleasant as she appears on those Bayer aspirin commercials. In addition to answering some questions that test patently useless knowledge, Mr. Wolinetz tell some incredibly lame jokes and one horrifically unfunny story.

Good times.

For those of you that are interested in seeing a performance of Olivierian proportions and live in the New York metropolitan area, please tune into Channel 7 (ABC) at 12:30 p.m. on Wednesday, July 6th. About five minutes into the show, Mr. Wolintez will be on and he will stay there for the rest of the episode. Without spoiling anything, watch the half-walk/half-jog and quick wave that he gives to the audience as they call him onto the stage. If lumbering, awkward movements were tasty sandwiches, he'd be a boatload of Big Macs. For those of you outside the N.Y.C. area, please check your local listings. No matter your location, the airdate remains the same.

Congratulate Geoff while hitting him up for a loan: geoff - @ - yankeepotroast . org.