Monday, July 11, 2005

— Listicles —
Having Felled Gore Vidal with a Punch, Only to Hear the Line “Words Fail Norman Mailer, Yet Again,” Mr. Mailer Can Only Come Up with Answers in the Car, on the Way Home

Whit Coppedge

'Mailer Time'

  1. No — they fail you!
  2. As if they don’t, as well, sometimes also fail you, too. Sometimes. Bore Vidal.
  3. Just fuckin’ with you, man.
  4. Yeah? Well, self-defense fails you.
  5. Fat lips fail Gore Vidal. [Note: could lead to retaliatory kiss.]
  6. Maybe, but my fist is a success!
  7. Just wanted to see if a black eye twinkles.
  8. Nice try, Myra Breckenridge.
  9. I don’t need that many as long as I’ve got my favorite two: “knuckle sandwich.”
  10. Yep - and as soon as you get up, they’re gonna fail me once more.

— How To —
Signs That Internet Dating Is Not Going Well for You
Jon Stahl
That Panamanian-transvestite-platypus dating Web site that you click onto as a joke has a very clear (and actually quite flattering) picture of you on it.
— Fiction —
Interview with an Interview with Ann Coulter
Ed Murray
As I picked up a recent copy of Time magazine (April 25, 2005), I casually stroked the middle buttons of my fly with the thumb and forefinger of my right hand and realized that I was unquestionably terrified of this issue's cover girl: Ann Coulter.
— Fiction —
Masters of My Domain: My Vices as Characters from "Seinfeld"
Russell Bradbury-Carlin
Pride = Jerry; Envy = Elaine; Sloth = George; Gluttony = Kramer

 

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