Monday, July 11, 2005

'Mailer Time'

  1. No — they fail you!
  2. As if they don’t, as well, sometimes also fail you, too. Sometimes. Bore Vidal.
  3. Just fuckin’ with you, man.
  4. Yeah? Well, self-defense fails you.
  5. Fat lips fail Gore Vidal. [Note: could lead to retaliatory kiss.]
  6. Maybe, but my fist is a success!
  7. Just wanted to see if a black eye twinkles.
  8. Nice try, Myra Breckenridge.
  9. I don’t need that many as long as I’ve got my favorite two: “knuckle sandwich.”
  10. Yep - and as soon as you get up, they’re gonna fail me once more.

How To
Signs That Internet Dating Is Not Going Well for You That Panamanian-transvestite-platypus dating Web site that you click onto as a joke has a very clear (and actually quite flattering) picture of you on it.
Fiction
Interview with an Interview with Ann Coulter As I picked up a recent copy of Time magazine (April 25, 2005), I casually stroked the middle buttons of my fly with the thumb and forefinger of my right hand and realized that I was unquestionably terrified of this issue's cover girl: Ann Coulter.
Fiction
Masters of My Domain: My Vices as Characters from "Seinfeld" Pride = Jerry; Envy = Elaine; Sloth = George; Gluttony = Kramer

 

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