Tuesday, February 6, 2007
Things You May Exclaim After Tumbling Down a Flight of Stairs That Turn Out to Be Made Entirely of Funnel Cake
by Lucas Held
Whoa!
I’m … completely O.K.!
What the—!
There goes my diet!
The powdered sugar knocked my teeth out … probably … eventually!
Is … is this funnel cake!?! Follow up question: why is this funnel cake?!?
Hope you were watching, cuz you’ll never see that again, baby!
That’s the first time funnel cake saved my life not at a state fair!
(Upon regaining consciousness): I must meet the architect/frymaster!
Now that was weird … literally!
Man, I must look like a grade-A goof right about n— My leg! It’s broken!!!
Lucas Held is a New York City based comedian, writer and filmmaker. Search his name on YouTube to have your perception of reality plucked from the street in broad daylight, tortured, and left face-down in a ditch to die the lonely death of an anonymous drifter.