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The Journal of Literary Satire | Hastily Written & Slopilly Edited
Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Memorable Lines from Anti-Sniper Movies

by Brendon Lloyd

Le Assassin

Assassin: (lighting a cigarette and cleaning his rifle: But my victims live on in my mind. I’d kill them again, but my own life is the only one I don’t have the guts to take.

The Sniper

Little Girl: What are you doing?
Sniper: Oh. I didn’t expect anyone up here. I’m a cupid who shoots people so they fall in love.
Little Girl: Wow! Cupid! Can I see through your scope?
Sniper: Well, just a quick peek.
Little Girl: That’s mommy and daddy. Are you gonna make them fall in love?
Sniper: (to the wind) What have I become?

Cold Snake 3: Apocalypse

Cold Snake: I called myself Cold Snake for so many years that I became one. The only reminder of my humanity is … that I’m … bleeding to death in this warehouse.

Brendon Lloyd has trouble opening up to people. Maybe it's because he puts up emotional walls to protect himself from being hurt. It all started in his childhood, which is actually a long story. But he will tell it to you if you really want.