Sunday, March 30, 2008 |
Happy Birthday, Tracy Chapman!
Dear Tracy,
I’ve got a fast car. It goes zoom! It also goes honk. It has a cupholder but it’s illegal to drink and drive. I lost my virginity in the back seat and also my keys in the trunk. Now I can’t get my hostage out because he’s locked inside the trunk with the keys. I’m afraid to take it to a locksmith, because the locksmith might get upset if he cracks open the trunk and recognizes the hostage as an old friend. So now I just sit around in my keyless fast car. I can’t zoom anymore but I can still honk! Happy birthday.
Love,
Josh
