Friday, December 19, 2008
Whopper Sluts

In Rumania the vans arrive one day large from many frantic strangers which are friendly only they hold to look at their watches, much. Also, one of us knows parts of the strangers’ language she tell us that they uses above and again the word “virgins.” This frightens many. Arrival of the command of strangers with the much complicated equipment and also above and again this word “virgins.” Virgins instructed to hidden themselves in the cellar of the root whereof the rutabaga are restrained in the winter! Virgins huddle in the cellar of the root! The one of us which knows the parts of the strangers’ language does not know the other word repeated together with “virgins” but she speaks that it believes it means “something which enormous”! Much uneasiness!

Miracle! Nicolae, elder of village, bring to visitors Rumanian traditional delicacy of olives with language of cow as the gesture of peace to the strangers. Strangers propose in the exchange unknown foodstuff. Foodstuff, is enveloped. Many of us it is fearful on this foodstuff. In the Rumanian culture is not the custom-house to place between 2 grain crops a bifsteyk. Bread, we have in Rumania, but to establish between them a bifsteyk, never has this thought entered our reasons.

Miracle! Frantic strangers still repeating “virgin” but estimate us and select some such as me, Ecaterina, and my sister of Emiliana. Is obvious not virgins. (Shhh! Emiliana repelling, is still virgin. But still they select it.) Strangers indicating this one and that one, one stranger indicating, asking “virgin?” Another speaking yes, it is virgin. Wonder and puzzlement! To nod on repellent hag like Emiliana but to swivel head on sexual youthful maiden which bears tennis shirt Nike and refused order to huddle in the cellar of root!

Miracle! Foodstuff not bifsteyk between 2 grain crops only. It supplements with the savoury others of alien flavors and tastes. Much of us want no part of this foodstuff, but some count it even more very tasty than of mush of cornmeal or the evaporated cabbage with the weft or sausage. Some prefer one variety of foodstuff while others prefer variety named with the word which made itself fearful when we examine it thinking also of the word “virgins.”

Now, when strangers departed, discord arises in the mudflow and no more with length friendship among neighbors rules above the village. Those which accepted to hitch to the foodstuff heap into their carts and track to the more extensive of metropolis Bucharest, where is choice of both varieties of foodstuffs preferred one by some, one by others. These formerly bosom of friends are now taken into account contaminated by filth and are computed as orgiastic! We degrade them as nephritis jezebels, also, in the street now custom-house is to glare on them and expectorate on their feet!

Oh my cherished sister of Emiliana, that this you fell among the dissolute crowd! You that trod narrow way devoutly through the life, in proportion to it chaste as nun! I shudder in order to behold you, that they give cold handle! Oh the irony, Emiliana, which you it lumped with the outcasts, considered as the dirty wiping cloth, when you never knew the joy of man’s pulsating term! My poor, my pitiable adherent of the new foodstuff, I too must connect with the rest and strive upward on good mouthful of saliva. Hock!

Tom Flesher is probably best known for lighting it up against Malvern Prep one extraordinary Saturday three years ago, and the rest of his life may well become a sad downhill slide from that crowning achievement.

Your President-Elect Bambu Obama
Left, exotic, elitist President-Elect Barry Obama, in a straw fedora w/ cigarette, circa 1980, courtesy The New York Post. Right, the exotic, elitist mascot for Bambú rolling papers, since 1764.
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