Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Back to the Future Part III (1990)
Lovelace’s Rating: -5.5/10

Keywords: Douche, Impossible, Dumb, Michael J. Fox is a dork, If Clint Eastwood had actually been in this movie maybe it wouldn’t have been so douche, Flux Crapacitor, Cowboys are gay… (more)

Helicopter count: 0
Mercenary points: 0
Roundhouse kick count: 0

Most people don’t realize this movie actually sucks!!!

Audio/Visual unsynchronized: During the opening sequence, a full orchestra can be heard playing the douche Back to the Future theme. The orchestra is, however, nowhere to be seen. This happens other times too. Invisible instruments are impossible.

Factual errors: Time travel is more than likely impossible.

Anachronisms: Most of the film is set in 1885. It’s shot on 35mm film but 35mm film was not invented until 1892, so basically it’s impossible. Also the movie was filmed using Panavision cameras, which weren’t even made until 1952, and the film coloring is done by Deluxe, which didn’t even start coloring film until 1953. Double douche.

Revealing mistakes: In some scenes, Michael J. Fox is on the screen in two places at the same time, which is obviously impossible.

Factual errors: When Christopher Lloyd says “Just between me and you…” to Michael J. Fox, it isn’t just between the two of them—there are cameramen and sound guys and a load of other crew nearby probably who can also hear what he’s saying! Not to mention the fact that he is being filmed. Literally tons of people are going to hear what he says next!!

Factual errors: The bear is probably not even a bear. It’s probably just a man in a bear suit, which is douche and lame.

Incorrectly regarded as goofs: At the beginning of the movie, when Michael J. Fox is resting his feet on a “hoverboard,” it appears to be floating, which is impossible. In reality, it was being held up by a series of springs or something. Whatever. Hoverboards don’t even exist.

Miscellaneous: When Christopher Lloyd reads the letter that he has supposedly sent himself from the past, he reads aloud. Usually people read quietly or normally even silently!

Factual errors: None of the actors in the film were even born in 1885, which is super dumb and douche.

Plot holes: Christopher Lloyd says that he and Michael J. Fox may “have to blast” to recover the DeLorean. Seconds later, the pair are in a graveyard and Lloyd sets off some explosives. This should have taken probably over several hours to set up but in the film it takes literally like a second or something.

Miscellaneous: Michael J. Fox’s punches all miss Thomas F. Wilson, and yet Wilson still pretends he has been hit, which is definitely completely lame. In martial arts films, for example the awesome Future Punch, the guys are actually fighting for real.

Factual errors: When Michael J. Fox is asked by Lea Thompson what his name is, he pauses a second and then says “Clint Eastwood.” His name is not Clint Eastwood, it is Michael J. Fox.

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