Monday, March 30, 2009

Or right-click to download:Ode to My Nanny Career.wav

I’ve been a nanny for lo so many moons,
And I’ve seen my charges grow up, take wing, and bloom!
There’s only one thing I want to change next time:
I’ve got to stop beating the kids.

How I love children, their faces warm and kind.
There’s no higher calling on earth than mine.
They go home at five, and I get to unwind!
Oh, I’ve got to stop beating the kids.

Babies are a blessing, sent from above.
I cherish their laughs, their lessons, their loves.
I do a great job guarding their dreams;
It’s only on occasion they need guarding from me –
Cos I’ve got to stop beating the kids.

All kids are bad, from time to time.
It don’t mean they deserve the belt and solitary confine.
Maybe tomorrow, my temper will abate.
Oh, I’ve got to stop beating the kids.
Oh, I’ve got to stop beating the kids.
Oh, I’ve got to stop beating the kids.

Katelyn Sack is a writer, musician, and painter currently residing in Charlottesville. Her art has been displayed in numerous venues, and her writing has appeared or is pending publication in Timothy McSweeney’s Internet Tendency, The Science Creative Quarterly, and Opium Magazine. She would like a book deal, please.

Diablo Cody Tells a Joke First of all, I am so not worthy of this. I mean, now that I'm all problemed-out Hollywood-style, it's queer (not gay) for me to hang out and just talk or whatevs. Wait--hold on--I'm going to Tweety-Tweet like Sylvester is raging!
Unintended Consequences of Six Oft-Forgotten Tariffs The Tariff of 1828 (a.k.a. "the Tariff of Abominations")

Find recent content on the main index or look in the archives to find all content.



RSD | RSS I | RSS II | Atøm | Spanish









From the Y.P.aRchives


Fun, Fickle Fiction (for Free!)
Fact, Opinion, Essay, & Review
Poetry & Lyric
Advice, How To, & Self-Help


Spectacular Features, Calendrical Happenings, Media Gadflies
Media Gadflies
Calendrical Happenings
The Book Club


Semi-Frequent Columns
Letter from the Editors
Disquieting Modern Trends


Interviews with Interviewers
One-Question Interviews


Correspondence (Letters To and Letters From) Letters from Y.P.R. Letters to Y.P.R. Birthday Cards to Celebrities


The Y.P.aRt Gallery Illustrious Illustration Photography Photomontage Graphic Design Logo Gallery


Pop Stars in Hotel Rooms Shreek of the Week of the Day What's Up with That? Fuit Salad Nick's Guff Vermont Girl The M_methicist Daily Garfield Digest Polish Facts: An Antidote to the Polish Joke


New & Noteworthy Et Cetera, Et Cetera, Et Cetera


Contributors' Notes


The Y.P.aRchives

This journal is powered by Movable Typo 4.01.

Y.P.R. & Co.