Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Some Nature Haiku

The Tree
The proud, burly tree
Rests on the now crashed TV
Thanks a lot, nature

Bees dance in the air
Merrily they dart about
I’m stung eighteen times

Bees and the Tree
I tend to my stings
With aloe from the felled tree
But it doesn’t work

The stings are swollen
Causing pain TV can’t ease
As a tree’s on it

All over I bleed
30 Rock should be on now
I wish I were dead

Nature’s Lesson
Life is meaningless
The universe is empty
Do not go outside

Ryan Mazer—Birmingham, Alabama, 5’9”, green eyes, stock build, looking for young soul. Previously, Ryan submitted a similar personal ad to an online literary journal as his bio. Had he known his attempt to be clever would so irritate everyone that it would force him to write actual personal ads as his only hope for companionship, he would have thought twice before sending. But now he sits alone by a rainy window, weeping to the score of Requiem for a Dream. Despair. Anyway, he’s great fun and a load of laughs!

IV/XX "Excerpts from Marijuana Magazine’s Special Issues" & "Big Deal! I Sold a Little Weed to Give My Kids a Better Future …"
Your Subscription to Netflix Has Been Canceled Your dry cleaning has been incinerated, the remaining value of your gift cards has been electronically deleted, your electricity will be shut off in three days, all your jokes will fall flat, and you will forget how to whistle.
Passover/under What you can buy for two zuzzim.

Find recent content on the main index or look in the archives to find all content.



RSD | RSS I | RSS II | Atøm | Spanish









From the Y.P.aRchives


Fun, Fickle Fiction (for Free!)
Fact, Opinion, Essay, & Review
Poetry & Lyric
Advice, How To, & Self-Help


Spectacular Features, Calendrical Happenings, Media Gadflies
Media Gadflies
Calendrical Happenings
The Book Club


Semi-Frequent Columns
Letter from the Editors
Disquieting Modern Trends


Interviews with Interviewers
One-Question Interviews


Correspondence (Letters To and Letters From) Letters from Y.P.R. Letters to Y.P.R. Birthday Cards to Celebrities


The Y.P.aRt Gallery Illustrious Illustration Photography Photomontage Graphic Design Logo Gallery


Pop Stars in Hotel Rooms Shreek of the Week of the Day What's Up with That? Fuit Salad Nick's Guff Vermont Girl The M_methicist Daily Garfield Digest Polish Facts: An Antidote to the Polish Joke


New & Noteworthy Et Cetera, Et Cetera, Et Cetera


Contributors' Notes


The Y.P.aRchives

This journal is powered by Movable Typo 4.01.

Y.P.R. & Co.