Will Layman & Chris Osmond re both bald. Not just balding like your friend Tim with the forgiving girlfriend, but really, really cue-ball bald and proud of it. They formerly played together in the smarty-pants D.C. rock band "Avant Gaardvark," which lit the sky like a flaming eagle or at least a sort of smoldering blue jay. Now they play harmonically obtuse reed solos in jazz bands in Chapel Hill, N.C, and D.C., respectively. In addition to their work as professional complainers, they are both teachers of different sorts, and they can give you a detention if you so much as look at them funny.