what's that rattle?
LITERARY HOGWASH

DAILY PIECE    |    FEATURES

G.W.'s FRUIT SALAD    |    LETTERS

BIRTHDAY CARDS TO CELEBRITIES

SUBMIT    |    KINDRED SPIRITS


March 3, 2003       |       Today's Terrorist Threat Level: YELLOW...       |       Happy Birthday, Tone Loc!

ain't no thang!

T E Q U I Z A   M A K E S
M E   T E Q U E A S Y


BY
NICK JEZARIAN



Boston:

Ollie the Barber sits on a barber's chair and looks out his storefront window. Beside him is his assistant (and sole employee), a one-armed, one-eyed, 300-pound midget named Slim. They have been without customers all day. The two barbers sulk as they watch the long lines of customers waiting for each of the three side-by-side barbershops across the street.

Slim: Hey Boss, you mind if I head out early today since we ain't got no bizness again?

Ollie: Why do you think no one comes here, Slim?

Slim: I donít think they trust ya's.

Ollie: Why wouldnít they trust me? Iím Ollie Barber!

Slim: Ever hear of Ali Baba?

Ollie: No.

Slim: Never mind then.

Slim walks out the door.

Ollie: Fuckin' midget.

THE END.






MORE DAILY PIECES

°caramba!


ABOUT Y.P.R.    |    STAFF    |    CONTACT    |    HELP    |    SUPPORT Y.P.R.

A NOTE ABOUT THE TYPE

RECIPE FOR YANKEE POT ROAST

© 2003, Yankee Pot Roast