HEADLINES I CAN'T BELIEVE
Crunch! Giant Cheeto Spurs Online Frenzy
Monkeys Flee Research Center, Keepers Trying to Lure Them with
Mountain Covers Its 'Nipple'
Cameroon Bans Urine 'Remedy'
Latrine deaths over Kenyan cell phone
Millionaire Cough Was 'Dust Allergy'
Comedian Dick Smothers' Son Launches Porn Career
It's Yellow, but Not French
COMMENTS I CAN'T BELIEVE I'VE OVERHEARD IN
"Oh my God, between the war and my back, it's been an emotional rollercoaster."
"Are you just telling me that I'm the tallest of the midgets?"
"If I get another box of pencils as a gift, I'm going to kill somebody."
"Oh shit, there's my shoe."
"Oh yeah, no one would have watched "Friends" then, that's when Anthrax was on. Personally I found "Friends" more entertaining."
"But I've yet to have charges pressed against me."
"Well, Allie doesn't drink Liquor."
"The Q4 2001 Travel Promotion wasn't successful."
"Well, I've got a walk-on-water meeting at 2, and then a turn-water-into-wine meeting at 3, and then I'll look into it after that."
"Jennifer, go on the Internet and find out what red means."