con queso!
LITERARY RUMBLE

DAILY PIECE    |    FEATURES

G.W.'s FRUIT SALAD    |    LETTERS

BIRTHDAY CARDS TO CELEBRITIES

SUBMIT    |    KINDRED SPIRITS


nominate this!

C O M P L E T E   L I S T   O F
N O M I N E E S

[Bold = Should win. ]

[Red = Will win. ]



Best Best Boy:

  • Igor Jelen, "xXx"
  • Alexander Griffiths, "Adaptation."
  • Arthur D. Whitehead, "Spider-Man"
  • Malcolm Nefsky, "Chicago"
  • Todd Piepenbrok, "8 Mile"

Best Performance by Maggie Gyllenhaal:

  • Drew Barrymore's Sexy Roommate, "Confessions of a Dangerous Mind"
  • Cute Makeup Girl I'm in Love With, "Adaptation."
  • Hot Chick I Want to Nail on Top of a Hewlett-Packard Copier, "Secretary"
  • Girl in a Movie I Didn't See, But With Whom I Still Want to Sleep, "40 Days and 40 Nights"

Best Supporting Rack:

  • Natalie Portman as Padm Amidala, her shirt conveniently torn in half, "Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones"
  • Kirsten Dunst as Mary Jane Watson, soaking wet and confused, "Spider-Man"
  • Liv Tyler as Arwen, pointy ears and all, "Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers"
  • Halle Berry as Jinx the black Bond babe, "Die Another Day"
  • Monica Bellucci as Sylvia, the naked assassin hooker, "Brotherhood of the Wolf"

Best Moment That Creeped Me Out:

  • Salma Hayak looks like my Uncle Manny, "Frida"
  • Two hobbits in love, "Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers"
  • Trying to swallow Tiffani Thiessen or Ta Leoni as a plausible love interest for Woody Allen, "Hollywood Ending"
  • Kathy Bates stark nekkid in "About Schmidt"
  • What's unintentionally implied by the title in "The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys"

Best Reason to Revoke a Previously Awarded Oscar:

  • "Snow Dogs," Cuba Gooding, Jr.
  • "Snow Dogs," Cuba Gooding, Jr.
  • "Snow Dogs," Cuba Gooding, Jr.
  • "Snow Dogs," Cuba Gooding, Jr.
  • "Snow Dogs," Cuba Gooding, Jr.

Best Title Translated into Another Language:

  • "8 Miglia," Italian.
  • "Rollen fr Columbine," German
  • "Confessions d'un Esprit Dangereux," French
  • "Meu Casamento Grego Gordo Grande," Portuguese
  • "Muerte a Smoochy," Spanish




MORE OSCAR COVERAGE

Nominees    |    Goodie Bag    |    Song

Postcard from J.R.    |    B.V.'s To-Do List

H.Y.'s Acceptance Speech

tawdry!


ABOUT Y.P.R.    |    STAFF    |    CONTACT    |    HELP    |    SUPPORT Y.P.R.

A NOTE ABOUT THE TYPE

RECIPE FOR YANKEE POT ROAST

© 2003, Yankee Pot Roast