Of Course the Fat Cat Wants Pizza, You Maroon

Jon is seen holding the phone and then asking who wants pizza. Sign of stupidity number one—hello, Jon! Why don’t you ask if they want the pizza first and then pick up the phone. Why waste your time waiting for…

A Press Conference with New White House Spokesman Darth Vader

by Russell Hasan

You will address me as Lord Vader. I am a Dark Lord of the Sith. (Breath, breath.) I have hired a team of bounty hunters to deal with the President’s critics …

Nipsey Fan Seeks Same

Dear Nick, I was reading with interest your article from October 5, 2005 [“Dear Nipsey”]. It is interesting, and I was wondering if you ever found out who the owner of this AOL Nipsey Russell fan page is. I know…

Excerpts from What Lessons Can We Learn from Little Johnny, Neighborhood Scamp?—Health & Citizenship Development Series (Educational Resources Ltd.)

by Anthony Jaffe

One morning on his way to school, Johnny stopped by the creek and caught a big, fat frog, which he hid in his knapsack. Later that day, he slipped the frog into Mrs. Smith’s purse while she was writing equations…

Onstage Play-by-Play: Oklahoma!

by Dale Dobson

Good afternoon, theatre fans of the airwaves! This is Dick Cox bringing you all the news, up to the minute, immediately as it happens, here at the Goodspeed Opera House, where the much-anticipated opening night performance of Oklahoma! is about…