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Gone Fishin’

Y.P.R. will return in the canicular days of August. Until then, please help yourself to our archives… and we eagerly await your Harry Potter parodies!…

Disquieting Modern Trends: Summertime (and the Living Is Uneasy) Edition

by Will Layman & Chris Osmond

Kool Aid, courtesy Jamestown Dep't of Travel & TourismWell, it is deepest, darkest summer, and the good people here at Disquieting Modern Trends are drunk with sweaty disgust. Sure, summer is great if you’re a school-kid and everything about your life is dictated by your hatred for the quadratic formula1, but for the rest of us this season of ant-infested picnics, high humidity, hurricane-haunted haze, and endlessly overblown and disappointing multiplex screenfodder is a long march through pseudo-recreational hell.

There. We said it: Summer is overrated. Summer is not what it used to be. Summer is kind of like a three-month version of Christmastime—a time that is supposed to cause unfettered joy in good, well-adjusted, Valerie Plame-outing Americans but, in fact, causes any reasonably intelligent person to feel precisely the opposite, wondering throughout, What is the matter with me that I don’t love the sun-drenched days of July, the grilled hot-dog dinners, the chlorine-soaked afternoons at the pool? There’s nothing wrong with you, baby. You’re …

Aussie Love

by Nick Jezarian

In my office building the other day, I looked up at the you-have-no-option-but-to-stare-mindlessly-at-me-news clips screen in the elevator and felt exceedingly empty. No, it’s not because I’m Australian. I felt empty for Captivision, the editor/information-gathering Oompa Loompas who feed Captivision…

Meet Your Subway Sandwich Artist

by Ray Stillman

Hello, I am Manesh! I pick the bread. I am Manesh the bread picker! You tell me what type of bread you want for your sandwich and I pick it out for you! I squeeze it with my hands to…

Polish Fact

Unofficial State Mottos
Bóg, Honor, Ojczyzna ("God, Honour, Fatherland")
Za wolność Waszą i Naszą ("For your freedom and ours")
Ojczyzna, Nauka, Cnota ("Fatherland, Education, Virtue")

Learn a Foreign Tongue!

Golpéeme, bebé, una más vez.
Hit me, baby, one more time.

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Wednesday, August 10, 2005   |    Etc.

We’ll Be Right Back after a Quick Word from Our Sponsors …

Hello Y.P.R-keteers!

We just wanted to poke our heads in the room for a moment to let you know that Y.P.R. will be back with brand-spanking-new content on August 15, 2005. For now, please peruse our copious archives of content and let us know if you’d like to join the Y.P.R. family by submitting.

Additionally, we’re in the process of reviewing current submissions. If you’ve submitted something in the last two weeks, have no fear. We’ve got it and we’re looking at it. If you submitted prior to that (i.e., a few months ago) and haven’t heard back, we apologize deeply and ask that you send your submission back to us. Our desk is a mess.